Transition in Ministry is Personal

After searching, browsing and searching some more I’ve discovered there are many articles and blog posts written about transition in ministry but yet very little, if any at all, discuss the personal side of the transition. As a matter of fact I wrote an article about transition in ministry about four years ago and no where did I discuss the personal side.

It’s been a little more than two weeks since my wife and I moved from Pennsylvania to Indiana where I have taken on the Student Ministries Pastor position at Agape Christian Church. And in the last several days I have been experiencing some feelings I wasn’t anticipating, but yet are completely normal. And maybe the reason I wasn’t anticipating or thinking about these feelings is simply because it’s been 9 years since I made such a big transition in ministry and life. On December 27th, 2001 my wife and I moved from New Jersey to Pennsylvania. Now, nine years later on the same date we’ve moved from Pennsylvania to Indiana. (We keep heading more West. Maybe by the time I’m ready to retire we’ll head to Colorado and hang with Jason Lamb.)

At this point I probably need to define for you what I mean by “personal” side of transition in ministry. Because let’s face it…transition in ministry IS personal. What I’m referring to are the following: leaving behind family and friends, feeling homesick, and unfamiliar with the area.

The Lord had said to Abram, “Leave your native country, your relatives, and your father’s family, and go to the land that I will show you.” – Genesis 12:1

Our house is not YET our home – yes it’s our furniture and our stuff, but for the past several years we had grown accustomed to and comfortable with our duplex home in Pennsylvania. Here in Indiana everything is new and trying to find the simplest of things in the kitchen can be slightly frustrating. And why is it frustrating? Because it’s not what I’m used to I’m a person of routine and habit and so to have my favorite crackers tucked in the back of the middle cabinet is not normal. (I know, it OCD like behavior) And let’s not forget to mention the fact that I’m not used to someone shoveling my walk and driveway when it snows, but it’s included in our rent. I know what you’re thinking, “Brian, it’s a perk. Be thankful you don’t have to do it yourself.” Don’t get me wrong, I do appreciate it. But at the same time I enjoyed shoveling my walk and drive in Pennsylvania because it gave me a reason to chat with my neighbors not to mention the health benefits of shoveling snow. And there’s the fact that my neighborhood is mostly older people. I feel like we moved into a retirement community. Maybe the senior living residence next door might be some indication. And rather than wheel my garbage can to the curb I have to drive it to neighborhood dumpster. It just doesn’t feel like home yet and so I’ve felt out of sorts lately.

Something is missing. Oh yeah…my atheist neighbor  – In Pennsylvania my next door neighbor is an atheist. There are three things he loves; beer, talking about religion and fishing. Most of the time all three are taking place at the same time. But as I sit here in my new home there is a familiar sound I haven’t heard lately. It’s the sound of Kevin opening his garage door to spend some time hanging in his man cave grillin’ and chillin’. Yes, even in the winter he would be out there and I’d take the opportunity to stop on over to say hello and hear his latest stories about fish, the government and religion. Though he has not put his faith and trust in Jesus…yet. I never stop telling him about Jesus. And I guess lately I’m missing those man-cave moments where I had the chance to talk freely about Jesus with an atheist that has told me so many times how much he respects me and thinks of me as a brother.

I love my wife but I’m driving her crazy – Since my wife was laid off from her job in Pennsylvania as well as our move and my little sabbatical before starting at Agape we have spent a lot and I mean a lot of time together. It’s been great! But…we have come to realize that spending too much time together causes some tension, and desires to get away…from each other…alone…me time, needed.

Our kitchen in our new home is much smaller than our last place, so we find ourselves bumping into each other often. The first few times was cute, but after awhile it’s just down right annoying.

Transition in ministry is personal. It affects more than your ministry life, but for some reason this is the side we read about the most. I’ve had some fun sharing about my own transition in this little rant (hope you had a good laugh). And I can’t thank my new church family enough for welcoming us to Terre Haute and doing what they can to make the “personal” side of our transition here more comfortable.

My office may not be completely set up, I’m still getting to know my students and parents, I haven’t figured out where everything is at the church, and I have my first board meeting this week. But having our new church family and friends take personal time and care into helping not only me, but also my wife Kim, feel at home in our home has been a big encouragement and comfort.

So as I prep to co-lead the Transitions in Ministry Connecting Group with Shan Smith at this year’s SYMC, I’ve been giving a lot of thought about the personal care of youth workers that are in transition based on my own experiences. I am looking forward to connecting with other youth workers who are or will be facing transition of some sort in ministry to hear their stories, pray and be an encouragement to them.